Hannah's Plan

Our Hannah started public school today. This experience is a bit unique to us, despite the number of kiddos we have. She has been rather dreading her first day as a sophomore, when she has to leave the freedom and security of life at home and go into windowless classrooms full of bored and hurting teens.

Our other kids her age and ability have started early college, but God has Hannah on a different track. She’s a bit of an athletic star, and as such has the privilege of playing basketball for the high school. Last year she played JV as a freshman and learned a ton. All the other girls had played together on special teams since they were in fifth grade. But this group let her in. It was a bit of a miracle in itself for the typically insecure group of public school girls to be nice to a former home –schooler they didn’t know, especially one who might take their position.

We talked on the way this morning about goals for the year. She has been praying for a friend with whom to share the battle. She knows she is there to make a difference. In this situation, you can hardly go in preaching on a soapbox and be effective. So the goals are:

1) Strive to succeed in everything you do. God may continue to grace your abilities and favor you, I reminded her, because when others respect you it gives you a platform for the gospel.

2) Plan now to put something into everyone you meet, even if it is a smile, a listening ear, a companionable acceptance of who God made them to be.

3) Look for the honest occasional opportunity to mention Jesus in your general conversation, so that people will understand why you are so giving, happy, and successful. (This part isn’t preaching, but just dropping a hint so the questioners will have an answer.) And

4) Pray for each person in your new environment, that God will stir up the circumstances in their lives so that their “field” will be tilled and ready for the seed you can plant. Ask God for a specific strategy for each person, and insight into their need beyond the school façade.

Even though I know the Lord made it clear this was His plan for Hannah, I had a moment of overwhelming sadness as I dropped her off. Watching the kids enter the building, it was hard to leave her there in that environment where students and teachers seem godless, bored, and beaten down. Her experiences last year (though full of blessings and victories) were a daily battle against the idea that being who you are is not good enough, as the prevailing attitude is often ridicule of joy and creativity.

I’m reminded that she is not mine, but the Lord's, and I raised her to be the person who challenges the status quo and fights that battle which is never against flesh and blood. I'm glad she goes forward on the offensive, praying and planting, knowing who she is and prepared to be a beacon in a very dark world.

When I picked Hannah up after school, she was all aglow. A few lockers down from hers, she made a new acquaintance her age who had been praying all summer for a Christian friend. What a joy that they can work the plan this year together!

My Kids Can Do Anything (and other things I've learned)

Wisdom I’ve gained from prolonged weakness:

1.My kids can do anything.

I’ve always been a delegator… I mean do you know anyone else who gives their two year old a daily chore? My one year old “helps” put away the plastic cups from the dishwasher and groceries (she’s soo cute. Today she had a brick of cheese and she says”heb-y” for heavy.)
But I digress.

I have discovered through weakness the need to delegate on a new level. And you know? I’ve found if I can provide vision and direction (and even sometimes when I can’t) my kids can learn to do it. Just the need is enough. And they amaze me. The weaker I am, the stronger they have become. They have developed so many great skills and are so proud of the contributions they make to our home and each other, as well they should be.

2. Cleanliness is relative

… (and right now my relatives are struggling with it. Just joking! )

What I mean to say is that the standards I used to keep have had to be adjusted. I have had to prioritize, and that means we clean the kitchen first, so we can stay healthy. We haven’t done so well with the corners, the closets, and the barn or the dusting. Some days it really seems we are almost caught up, then other days we seem to be barely getting by. But the good news is we’re still happy. I used to keep the standards. Now I just keep praying and receiving more grace.

3. I’m really a proud person.

I have always been able to produce, and I’ve been proud of this. Now on days when I’m blessed to get out of bed, I am humbled. I am poor in spirit. And that’s a good thing. And when my teens fly through with their perpetual round of friends to feed and house for the night, I am humbled anew because at times they get to step across food on the floor, use a dirty bathroom, get their drink next to a pile of dishes, and squeeze past Mount Laundry on their way through. Sometimes I am so humbled I can’t even stand to watch. The old me would have been bustling about fixing and cleaning. The new weakened me often gets to have a conversation with a young group of God-lovers.

4. Less is the new more

Doing less has allowed me to evaluate the life I used to live through new eyes. My Lord has shown me that my mothering has very little to do with the work I accomplish on their behalf, as I always used to believe. In fact, if my limbs did not work at all ( and I’m so grateful they do) I would still be able to be a loving mother by the choices I make for them personally and spiritually, and the way I run my home.

II Corinthians 12:7-9 Because of the surpassing greatness of the revelations, for this reason, to keep me from exalting myself, there was given me a thorn in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to torment me—to keep me from exalting myself!

Concerning this I implored the Lord three times that it might leave me. And He has said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.”

Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me. Therefore I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ’s sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong.