Today I am introducing a guest blogger, my 16-year old daughter Hannah. She wrote this for a school assignment and I thought everyone would enjoy a small sampling of life as a DeVyldere kid.

Sudden Death

As kids, my brothers, sisters and I had a lot of time and very active imaginations. We could basically make any random and seemingly boring object into the subject of a most interesting game. For instance, the clay-like mud that seemed to be the chief element in the field behind our barn was harvested and taken to our makeshift potter’s shop. There it was washed (with water from buckets and saucers set out to catch the rain), purified, and made into many clumsy, yet agreeable pots, vases and various other simple structures.  These were then dried and set on display at the “Market” along with the freshly picked flowers, aromatic “lemon leaves,” sprouted wheat (grass seed, harvested from the wild stocks in our back forty), and a variety of nuts, cracked at the cement slab we named the Nutcracker.  We built tree forts, discovered our own version of the Oregon Trail, and hosted several intense boot camps. There was simply no end to the amount of activities to do and chaos to create. 

            I remember specifically one year when we got our family’s first ever trampoline. When all the excitement of unadorned jumping wore off, we naturally began testing new ideas and games such as  “Fish Out of Water,” “Deer in the Headlights,” and “Black Out.” They were all interesting, but none of them came close to the challenging thriller my older brother fashioned. The entire game was based on the concept of “skying.” Skying occurs when one person, as they are landing on the trampoline, is propelled upwards by another person, who is putting all their power into bouncing the first person up.  This gives the skyee twice as much power as they would have had originally and an awesome high flying experience. Skying is undoubtedly a fascinating subject, one that we tried to explore to the fullest. And this new game, dubbed “Sudden Death,” combined the thrill of defying gravity with the challenge of a good competition. 

            “Sudden Death” would start off with one person as “it”. That person would start the game by jumping in the air and landing on his or her back (commonly known as a back bomb). At this point they would be skyed as high as one of the other players could get them. As soon as their back left the trampoline’s black textile, their goal was to touch one of the other three children on the trampoline before they landed again. It was that trio’s job to evade them and therefore avoid being “it”. 

This was, for the most part, a safe game, at least in our minds. Of course, their were times where a youngster, when tagged, would go flying off the trampoline due to the tagger’s inability to stop himself or his flailing limbs.  As the game progressed we started to become bored with it and looked for new ways to spice it up. The brilliant idea came to those of us who were not “it” at the time. The three of us secretly plotted to all sky the back bomber at the same time which, with any luck, would provide a truly epic sky. 

This was, for the most part, a safe game, at least in our minds. 

The new round started: one, two, three! All the power the three of us could muster was successfully transferred into our temporary foe’s back bomb. We watched our handiwork sky our brother higher than we had ever seen before or could have hoped for! Then it hit us. He wasn’t going to come back down on the trampoline! I probably should have mentioned before that when being skyed, it can be extremely hard to control what you’re doing or where you are going to land. Unfortunately, this thought had not crossed our ingenious minds while planning our great caper.  We cringed as we watched our brother speed head-first for the ground.

            Fortunately, he had enough experience with skying to know how to tuck his head and turn a nose dive into a flip. He landed somewhat feet first, smacking the ground with enormous force. He laid on the ground for a while, then picked himself up. His dazed eyes went from his muddy jeans, to us, to the ground, to the trampoline, to where he had reached his peak, then back to us in a repeating cycle. I wish I would have been able to focus more on what was going on in that moment, for that was one of a very few times I have ever seen that particular brother speechless. But I was still reeling from what had happened. We had all fallen off the trampoline multiple times before, but he had reached new heights. This made him a sort of legend in our minds. 

The expressions of those who were still on the trampoline were no longer the mysterious smirks of a plotting gang. Those peculiar grins had turned to smiles of satisfaction and pride at a brilliantly planned scheme; then to the blank stare of a realized mistake, as it dawned on us that we hadn’t thought about what would happen after he was in the air. Finally our faces changed to grimaces, as the thump he made scared the birds from their trees. We couldn’t have imagined that those events might have transpired. At least we didn’t imagine them. We certainly did not intend for that chilling experience to occur. However, we felt very responsible for that frightening incident. I looked at the astounded faces of my accomplices and saw my thoughts reflected in their minds. We had just discovered the most incredible game ever!      

A GATHERING OF GOOD FRUIT

My husband spent the last seven years “advising “a youth group of high schoolers as they sought God. They called themselves “The Gathering.” He gave a lot to this group, drove our kids to Lebanon every Sunday night and another night a week for meetings. Kids came from all over the valley, from at least six different towns to attend.

The group was unique. The kids dreamed their own dreams, made their own plans, created their own worship teams, taught and shared with each other. They were the leaders. He was the protector so that the group didn’t get waylaid by agendas other than what the Lord had given, so that the true ministry in the Spirit would go forth. He was the designated adult. At first, there was a lot of skepticism that high school kids could actually do what he expected them to do.

They made a lot of mistakes. But they grew.

It was a small New Testament version of church, where instead of “professional” Christians instructing the non-professional, the young and the newly saved were allowed to grow and share, where their gifts and callings were identified and given ample opportunities (encouragement, even nudging) for the body to build itself up in love.

They made a lot of mistakes. But they grew. One of the hallmarks of this group was its commitment to real radical relationships which were 180 degrees from the popular cultural norms.  Instead of pairing up and creating all the subsequent drama most youth groups thrive on, these young people committed to treat each other like brothers and sisters as the Bible teaches. They learned a lot about relationships by hanging out in groups.

They learned to serve, to teach, to encourage, to worship, to prophesy and pray with power. They saw a lot of healing, salvation, lives changed forever.

Others in the valley saw the power of the kids doing their own group. They followed suit, to some degree or another. Several large groups told the Gathering that they wanted youth leaders because they saw the passion of our kids. In some ways this group started a tiny revolution of high schoolers and college students being “the church”.

They went to Mexico, then the Dominican Republic.  Their passion and abilities changed the way ministries managed short-term missions. They began to do Spirit-led treasure hunts, scared to death at first, but gradually with more and more confidence. More and more lives were changed. Strangers were cured of cancer and broken bones and through this people of all ages who did not even know God were brought into HIS glorious Kingdom.

Groups graduated and moved on. A bunch went to Bible and ministry schools and missions, others to universities and careers where they brought what they had learned in the Spirit by experience. The Gathering students have traveled all over the world from our tiny church in Lebanon, Oregon. They have gone to Cambodia and Thailand, England, the Netherlands, India, through Africa and South America, and the list could go on and on. Whether aware of it or not, they carry the confidence of being trusted with the full weight of the gospel, and the power of experiences which many American Christians never gain.

What have the hundreds of kids who connected with this ministry received?  Most of all, they have experienced being with people their age who honestly and wholeheartedly love God and have practical ways to love each other. This is as simple as it is rare. People who wanted to pretend or play church were encountered by the power of God and got honestly real, or they didn’t usually stay around very long. 

A very wise person once told me. “When it comes to teens, you pretty much have two choices. If you treat them like children, they’ll act like little kids. But if you treat them like adults, they will rise to the challenge.” This is so profoundly true, and has been superbly demonstrated by the last seven years of The Gathering. Tony’s express purpose was to identify the gifts and callings in each individual and give ample opportunities for growth, with nudging and guidance as necessary. I am so proud that he wisely sacrificed his time and money for fruit which can never be taken away.

And it was a sacrifice. During these seven years he worked a stressful full-time job and coached our kids’ basketball teams, drove them to football, track, and soccer, taught some to walk and some to drive, changed a thousand diapers, and made his weekly awesome Sunday morning breakfasts. He took several groups of kids of all ages backpacking every summer to climb mountains. He was a volunteer, which means that he was never paid a penny, never acknowledged as a pastor or otherwise monetarily rewarded.  During these seven years, we added four children to our large family of nine, and “adopted” many teens and young adults. It was a good sacrifice for a great and lasting purpose.

The Bible tells us: “Now if any man builds on the foundation with gold, silver, precious stones, wood, hay, straw, each man’s work will become evident; for the day will show it because it is to be revealed with fire, and the fire itself will test the quality of each man’s work. If any man’s work which he has built on it remains, he will receive a reward.” The ripples of work in the Spirit cannot be fully measured this side of Heaven, but today I'm rejoicing in what I can measure... a Gathering of Fruitful Life!

Fear Be Gone

Today I am vaguely aware of an unsettled feeling. I dug a little deeper and recognized fear.

I don’t want it to be there, but fear is lurking in my subconscious just below the surface …enough for me to feel the unrest of a simmering soup pot of unwieldy emotions.

Simmering, not boiling.

But something’s cooking.

I guess it’s the unevenness of my life… some stuff doesn’t get done.

Okay...Let’s be honest here. A lot of stuff is right now not getting done.

And I am writing a blog.

And I’m resting, because I’m supposed to be resting or I’ll regret it.

You know, I was the girl who liked getting in every assignment in school, perfecting every grade, cleaning the house, controlling my surroundings.

I know life’s not like that.

Well, maybe someone’s life is like that.

But not mine.

I realize I have chosen anything but control and perfect order.

And usually I thrive on the excitement and level of faith this chaos forces me into.

I usually love that it forces me to rely on Jesus and I get to see miracles.

But I falter when that voice inside starts in with the “who do you think you are?” rhetoric…

And I wonder if my tight-rope walk is more me than Him and if He is really going to come through for me when I am probably even now failing Him.

Again.

Today, God is for me.

Be silent fear.  Love, wash over the imperfections of my life and drown out everything else.

Today, I will trust and not fear.

Adding Up the Years, Part 2

Again I am counting as I remember the past 22 years of parenting.

1,2,3.. Today I counted to 47,000.
Diapers changed in this household.
Over 22 years...
47,000, give or take a few.

As you gag in awe and disgust, I would like to offer an honorable mention to my life partner who, among all of his other wonderful traits, has hardly ever missed a chance to change a diaper.

I'm serious.
 
Ladies, take it from me, if you are going to choose a life partner, along with all the traits currently on your list, add  happily changes diapers. Even if you don't have a monstrous family like mine, you'll be glad you did!

 Add "   Happily changes diapers"  to your list of admirable traits when looking for a potential mate.

But I digress. Some numbers are astounding.  Like 12 years and 4 months of pregnancy. In those years, by the time I would nurse the newest baby, I would be having another.

I know. I'm not complaining, mind you. Just reminiscing.
I read a great “what people don't tell you about pregnancy" website the other day that said, “When it comes to getting your body back to your pre-pregnant state,  it’s best to think nine months on, nine months off.”  Pondering this, I laughed hysterically (some might say maniacally). 

My mantra might be, “At least nine and a half months on and 4-7 sleepless months off. Repeat."… For those of you who are really counting, just know that, in some random twist of fate..er...  that is..planned–for-my-growth design, I am the only person you know who has gone weeks overdue with twelve pregnancies.

Nursing. I think we’re talking at least fourteen cumulative years involved in that lovely activity.
And speaking of feeding children, three times a day for 22 years is 24,090 meals for an ever-increasing number of tummies pulled up around my table in varying sizes and appetites.

Laundry... oh please! Let's not talk loads. Let's just add up the mountains and let it go at that.

Then there are the books and songs. I probably shouldn’t even calculate how many times I’ve read the classic “Apple, Ducks, Block” or sung the “Rocking Chair Prayer” to a sleepy child.

Or a whole rocker full of children. I can fit four or five if I don’t need to turn the pages.

 Much more than can be added...

Of course, these are just statistics, and as such they are intrinsically deceiving.  In recent years, for instance, my kids have changed an awful lot (emphasis on awful) of diapers for their younger siblings and prepared many, many meals.  But parenting has been deeper and broader than these numbers suggest, thank the Lord.

As I look back, I am reminded of this one irrefutable fact. 

God has been faithful to my family. (Here circa 2004)
 

 Ooh, I am gonna hear about this one! Humility, children! Since we're counting, consider all the humiliation you've brought me... But seriously...

Our Creator has provided everything we needed to do what we’ve done. He has provided nice clothing, abundant good quality food, and more good books to read than we have room for. 

Our family has never lacked good friends of similar heart with whom to share the journey, support from creative, generous grandparents, and opportunities to let God’s love flow through us to and from others.

Our kids enjoyed the blessing of tree swings and trampolines in a large shady yard, the gift of cousins of similar ages to play with, and the chance to learn discipline through daily chores and yard work. 

They’ve gotten the home school advantage of independence and resourcefulness, and the depth of character-building from participating in sports teams.

And our Lord has provided all.

Looking back on the amazing journey only makes me more excited for the road ahead, 

even when I cannot see around the bend in the road.

God can be trusted. Think about it.

If you never trust Him, you’ll never know how cool life can be.
Adding up the numbers, to me they equal the sum of JOY!

Adding Up the Years

"It would seem that something which means poverty, disorder and violence every single day should be avoided entirely, but the desire to beget children is a natural urge."  Phyllis Diller

Today I am celebrating parenthood. This is the 22^nd anniversary of my foray into the job.  

A friend suggested adding it all up, like they do for lawyer’s ads. Parenting each child gives me an astounding 161 years of experience. Together, hubby and I can put (2, carry the one) 322 years of parenting experience on our shingle! 

Now I remember why people always do a double-take when they hear our lucky number 13!

Every parent soon realizes parenting is the hardest job you’ll ever love.

 Parenting is the hardest job you'll ever love

Everyone commiserates that the pay is lousy, but we sometimes forget the benefits are outrageous. Carrying thirteen babies, one at a time over a span of 20 years, first in my heart, my body, then my arms, my home, my car, and finally my prayers has changed much more than the size of my waist and the amount in my bank account.

When that tiny baby looked up at me with wonder for the first time, my heart and life were irrevocably changed. The logic and reason I had before that point were destroyed in an explosion of overwhelming maternal compassion and protection.

So were my eardrums, but that’s another matter.

I believe everyone should have babies and teenagers at the same time. That way, when the teen rolls his eyes and slams into his room, the baby will look up at you with this adoring smile that says, “My world is complete!” and you have a spark of hope for another day.

 Everyone should have babies and teenagers at the same time...

Conversely, when you have spent the day shushing a crying baby and wiping spit-up off your shoulder, the teenager can take a turn patting and pacing and have a real adult conversation as he does.

As for having a large family, I highly recommend it. Adaptability keeps us young. Many of the folks with whom we started out having children are now rattling around in their empty houses. When they lay down a book, that book inexplicably stays in exactly the same spot until they pick it up again a week later. It does not migrate behind the couch or under the toddler’s bed. They wake every morning to silence and the sound of birdsong, not screaming. 

I certainly don't envy them.

Granted, we don’t have the energy we once did, but we are still happily in the full circle of busy parenting. Every day is filled with the learning and wonder of childhood… multiplied, of course, by the myriad of experiences. 

Keturah is potty training, Ezra is learning to tie his shoes, and Faith is memorizing her multiplication tables. Hannah is playing basketball, while Micah just got his first job. Our capacity for variety and change is continually challenged, and there is no end in sight. 

At the age when our schoolmates are facing the empty nest, we are learning and growing instead of settling in. 

This suits me. I’m not ready to be old.

Years ago, I had a vision of two gardens. The first one was in a tiny back yard. It consisted of a few ruler-straight rows of vegetables carefully tended so there was not a weed in sight.  A few modest vegetables were growing on the stalks. It looked good and virtuous and proper.

The other garden was an imposing sight to behold. A huge mass of plant material sprang from the ground in every configuration imaginable. Flowers were entwined with vegetables and fruit in a wild mass of growth. Weeds grew all around the garden, and even in it there were a few. But what drew my attention was the fruit. In this wild chaos of a garden grew this luscious, massive produce. The fruit and flowers were everywhere in great abundance. 

 What drew my attention was the fruit

I felt in that moment that God was showing me the choice I could make with my life. In attempting to control my parenting, I could have a beautifully managed garden with some genuine fruit. Or, I could give up control and let the garden grow in God’s way. 

I would risk the scrutiny of others and the lack of showmanship, but I could have the big healthy fruit.

I chose fruit.

Take it from my considerable years of experience. The fruit is incredibly sweet!